Archive for June, 2009

Resilience and Succeeding In Life

Sunday, June 28th, 2009

Resilience is something that most people need to bounce back from whatever life throws at them. Everyone experiences difficulties in life, and some people will even experience traumatic events that create an upheaval in their lives. Resilience is the process by which people adapt to changes or crises, like death, divorce, tragedy, the loss of a job, or financial problems. Resilience is not a character trait - it can be learned by anyone, but learning resilience does require time and effort.

Several factors involved in resilience include having a loving support system, the ability to make plans and follow through with them, communication and problem-solving skills, having a positive view of yourself and your abilities, and the capability to manage your feelings and impulses. Building resilience is a different process for everyone, and what works for one person may not work for another. Each person should determine what works for them and do that.

It may be helpful to imagine resilience as a mountain climb to Mount Kinabalu for example. It is best to take that trip with someone else, particularly someone you love and trust. Having a plan in mind for how to navigate the trail is a good idea. Trusting your own instincts and abilities will help guide you along the way. Lastly, stopping along the trail to rest can be a great idea, but you will have to get back on and continue your journey in order to finish the trip.

Building resilience can be a challenging process. Here are a few tips for developing and strengthening resilience:

*Maintain good relationships with your family and friends, and accept their help in times of stress. Also, getting involved in community groups or faith-based organizations may help give you social support when you need it.

*Try to look at the big picture of life, and avoid viewing difficult times as insurmountable. Take small steps toward your goals and take one day at a time.

*Accept that change is a part of life and learn to embrace the circumstances that you cannot change.

*Keep working toward your goals every day, and ask yourself “What can I do today to move in the direction I need to go?”

*Keep a positive view of yourself and your ability to solve issues and challenges.

*Maintain a positive view of life and visualize what you want.

*Notice how you have changed after a tragedy or crisis. Many people report having more confidence in themselves after a crisis and some even have a deeper appreciation for life. Get what you can out of these tough times.

*Take care of yourself! Get enough food, sleep, and exercise to keep yourself healthy. This is especially important during times of stress.

*Lastly, seek professional help if you feel that the situation is too hard for you to handle on your own. A licensed mental health professional, such as a counselor or psychologist, can help you develop a strategy for moving forward in your life.